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HMG Clothing What kind of utter lunatic cuts about Nazi-occupied France in a Black French car, with a British flag attached to it, whilst wearing a kilt?
Probably the kind of lunatic that could call for the surrender of 23,000 Nazi soldiers, with no support - aside from that provided by the sheer size of his giant balls.
Meet Ronald Thomas Stewart Tommy Macpherson (Better known as Tommy). Commissioned in the Queens Own Cameron Highlanders in 1939, however in 1940 transferred to No.11 Commando, which is where at the age of 21 this young man’s story truly begins.
As part of a 4-man reconnaissance team on the Libyan Coast, Major Macpherson and his team were tasked with gathering intelligence ahead of the doomed Operation to take out Rommel himself – and unfortunately, his recce didn’t go too well either. Have you ever been stuck in town after a night out, waiting for a taxi that never shows up? Well, these guys spent over 48 hours bobbing up and down off the Libyan coast in canvas Kayaks waiting for a submarine to pick them up and guess what… that stupid submarine never turned up! Of course, the next part of this chapter so many 21-year olds can relate to; the inevitable decision to paddle back to an enemy shore, the reluctant decision to walk hundreds of miles back to Tobruk in shorts, and of course the bitter shame of being captured by Italian fascists - leading to two years in captivity.
Over this two-year period, Tommy made 7 attempts at escaping his captors – The 7th finally getting him back to Britain, but the first being the most hilarious. Soon after being captured his Italian interrogators took an interest in his Colt Automatic and wanted to know how it worked. The young Major proceeded to take out a spare magazine, load his weapon, make it ready and at gun-point hold them hostage. Unfortunately, due to the lack of food and water and excessive physical exertion over the past week or so, Tommy became Quadra-spazzed by cramp and collapsed – making him unable to make the most of this opportunity, and landing him in solitary confinement.
Anyway, fast forward through two long years in captivity, and Tommy is to learn just days after his safe return to Britain that his war is far from over. He had been selected for Operation Jedburgh, part of Churchills plan to “set Europe ablaze”. As part of a team of 3, Tommy would parachute into France, link up with French resistance and wage a guerrilla-war against Nazi forces.
On the night of the jump, Tommy actually wore full Cameron highland battle dress under his smock – which included a Tartan Kilt. After linking up with the French resistance some of the French fighters actually thought their officer had brought his wife along. The misunderstanding that Tommy was some fair French maiden was short-lived, for the following night he was commanding demolition taskings on railway bridges crucial to the Nazi’s supply lines. The following day the 2nd SS Panzer Division was on the move towards the beaches of Normandy to help drive the Allied invasion back into the sea. This division of Heavy German tanks and armour were battle-hardened from the eastern front and were guilty of heinous war crimes against civilians. Quick to act Tommy and his teams cut down trees and laid mines along their main roads of advance, as well as rigging surrounding trees with explosives and primed grenades. When the columns were halted by the felled trees the resistance fighters would spray the troop-carrying vehicles with machine-gun fire then vanish into the forest. The inevitable infantry follow-up would be met by nothing but falling grenades and exploding trees (Not desirable). As the columns then eventually moved off the lead tanks would hit the mines and the above process would repeat. Similar tactics were used by other French resistance units across France, resulting in this Panzer division taking over two weeks to reach Normandy rather than two days, and of course, by this point, the Allies had a firm foothold in France.
The French had never seen anything like Major Macpherson, and his existence was b
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